The Lion’s Ass & the Heretic’s Call!

Indeed, the stand that the Syrian President has just assumed during his national address is that of turning his back to the world and to the Syrian people. It was not his smiling face that people saw earlier today, but his farting ass.

Meanwhile, a just released report in the Syrian electronic press, has just devoted a whole section to my heretical self, branding me as “another adventurer seeking fame and dollars,” not to mention Bashar’s position.

While praising my charming mannerisms, my looks and my intelligence, the report nonetheless trashed everything else about me, especially my sense of timing and my intentions.

The report failed to mention, however, that during my recent talk at Brookings I criticized Bashar severely for failing to provide any vision for reform or change in the country as well as for adopting adventurist politicies. But that omission is, of course, quite predictable.

Nonetheless, my fate has just been sealed. Like it or not, I am an opposition figure now. Like it or not, I am going to have to act like one.

May the Goddess of the Heretics (and yes, she must be a goddess) have mercy upon my soul, and may She look kindly upon my friends and loved-ones that are still living back home and shield them from all harm.

Still, no matter what I do after this moment, I may never have a clear conscience again.

Alea jacta est!